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New Year Resolution Blues

How do you make this year the beginning of the best year of your life? 

(Also known as “How do I avoid the New Years Eve blues”)

We have all done it, you know, made the new years eve resolution promise to ourselves, this year is going to be different. More exercise, better food, more fun, less work, more money, less bills. This year I’m going to spend more time with the kids/wife. I‘m definitely going to be spending less so I can start that savings plan to finally put that deposit on a house. By about January the 6th it is Yes I must start that tomorrow and before you know it is December 31st and nothing much has changed. You of course are now feeling the new years eve blues.

How about you make this year different. How about you actually do something about it.

Many of you will have read this and said, “Why change now I have a perfectly good record of failing, why mess it up now”. Others will say, “But I have read all the books and it still hasn’t worked”.

The truth is you do have the ability to achieve. But like all things of value it will cost. The cost comes in many forms. Part of it will be money, but this is usually the least of the expenses. The real cost is you will have to lose an aspect of yourself. As you put this part down you will have the ability to pick up the new you, that you so desire to be, you deserve to be. One of my teachers from years past would say you have no right to share who you are with who you would become.

For change to take place the desire for the new must be greater than the comfort of the old. Frequently the desire for change will reside within your conscious mind. The comfort for what is current holds up with in your unconscious. The moment an individual acknowledges and accepts this, this is the first step towards making this year significantly better than the last.

The old adage is ‘Time is money; I have a different view, I believe time is life. It is about spending your time wisely, Each year you spend doing the same old thing, struggling with the same old issues is just a waste of life. Many people live as if they are going to live forever, yet die having  done very little with the greatest gift of all, life.

Time to change, realise that it will take another person to help you to change your unconscious conditioning. By training in NLP by attending NLP Coaching sessions or even becoming an NLP coach yourself ( as you teach others you will be creating huge amounts of emotional leverage on yourself to change ) you are taking the vital steps required to make this year better than the last. Make this year the year that you choose to change.

Remember Joy and Happiness comes in 3 forms.

Happiness level 1 is all about instantaneous. Some would say it is the Chinese food of happiness. Once eaten 20 minutes later you feel the need to eat again. As a society we are constantly marketed to with the intent to sell us the next short-term fix of happiness. From a commercial perspective this is perfect, the customer will need to buy your product again in 20 minutes. This of course benefits the seller but at what cost to the buyer?

Happiness level 2 is significantly more involved it take time to develop and time to achieve. You will not be able to buy it, you will have to develop it. These are things like relationships, a career, a particular skill, becoming a parent and being a fulfilled human being. Eating a chocolate would be the example of Level 1. Going to the gym and training for the next 6 months to get your body into peak performance is a level 2 happiness. Often to get Level 2 happiness you will have to let go of a little level 1 happiness.

Happiness level 3 is about your legacy. A healthy child, a redeeming social change, a solution to a simple or complex puzzle. It may be as profound as knowing that the people you are involved with breathe easier because of your existence.

Level 1 happiness is not better or worse than the other levels, it’s just that it’s short term. If you spend all the resources on short term solutions you’ll never be able to reach true happiness.

The message is simple when you spend all your resources on happiness level 1 there will always be an uneasy feeling of emptiness within you. As you spend more of your resources on Level 2, happiness and a feeling of being centred and fulfilled occurs. This then leads easily to Happiness level 3.

So when you’re feeling down or afraid of the new years eve blues, remember the difference between spending and investing. Spending leads to level 1 happiness, Investing leads to level 2 happiness. So next time you feel a bit empty or confused, ask yourself, is the solution to book an extravagant holiday for thousands of dollars for a week in Hawaii, that on returning you will be vibrant for a few weeks and then slide back into your old patterns or is it time to invest in your future of internal change.